"Vigilance, self-knowledge and discernment; these are the guides of the soul." --Abba Poeman
I am using two favorite publications for my morning prayer time that I refer to as "having coffee with God . They are "A Guide to Prayer for Ministers and Other Servants", compiled by Rueben P. Job and Norman Shawchuck, and the May/June 2009 issue of "Weavings: A Journal of the Christian Spiritual Life". The over arching theme of this issue of Weavings is "Cling Always to God". Both of these are published by the Upper Room publishing house. http://www.upperroom.org/
Today's scripture readings from "Guide", Psalm 18 and John 14:1-11, and the"Weaving's" first article by Dr. Roberta C. Bondi called "Traveling On" have been sticking with me throughout my day here at the School for New Directors of Connectional Ministry and District Superintendants. Maybe it is because so many of us are starting a new path of discipleship as leaders? Many of us are talking about how our lives have changed, how we have moved to new places, how we and our families are adjusting, and what it is that we think we need to do and ......Though we bemoan the stress of upheaval, we are feeling excited about what might be coming our way, too.
Bondi writes about moving as having the potential for good in our inner lives. She says that 5th century Christian monastics, the desert mothers (ammas) and fathers (abbas), made their lifestyle choice recognizing that "being uprooted from our ordinary ways of living in the world" can "make the invisable visable to us in a special way". She suggests "by looking at where we hurt when we move, we are able to see what we actually value most and evaluate what we see." Particularly revealing , she suggests, might be evaluating the patterns of relationship, feelings, and behaviors that repeat from move to move. We may find these are the places that most need God's healing power. I liked this particular story among those she shares from the abbas and ammas...
"A brother was restless in the community and often moved to anger. So he said, "I will go and live somewhere by myself. And since I shall be able to talk or listen to noone, I shall be tranquil, and my passionate anger shall cease." He went out and lived alone in a cave. But one day he filled his jug with water and put it on the ground. It happened suddenly to fall over. He filled it again and again it fell over. And this happened a third time. And in a rage he snatched up the jug and broke it. Returning to his right mind, the knew the demon of anger had mocked him, and he said, "I will return to the community. Wherever you live, you need effort and patience and above all, God's help." *
I still don't like moving, but I am pondering what I observe about my reactions. I know that the feeling of disequilibrium is natural and remind myself that "this too shall pass". But this time I sip and and ponder, thankful for that cup o' joe and Grace. I might just learn something before this is all through.
*quoted by R. Bondi (originally from "Of Patience, or Fortitude" 33, "The Sayings of the Fathers" in Western Asceticism, trans. Owen Chadwick (Philadelphia: Westminster Press, 1958), 92.)
Hey, Sue, glad to find your blog. I am adding it to my blogroll. I also wanted to attach this link to "How Deep the Well?", a blog I wrote about self care that applies to church leaders, both lay and clergy. http://doroteos2.wordpress.com/2009/03/12/how-deep-the-well/
ReplyDeleteDan
Hi Dan,
ReplyDeleteThanks for contacted me about the blog. You can see I am new to this, so it is nice to know that a few folks are reading it.
And, thank you for connecting me to "How Deep the Well?" Those are some sobering stats with a powerful message that should be informing our conversations about revitalizing churches, don't you think? How can either the pastor or a congregation offer what it doesn't have?